Monday, February 20, 2006
A New England Sports Hub Joint
THE HUB PRESENTS:
Pretzel Logic With Keith Foulke
(Spring Training Edition)
Keith asks Red Sox Nation:
You want fries with that batting practice fastball?
HEY THEO: SHUT THE FOULKE UP BEFORE HE HURTS HIMSELF...AND GET HIM A P.T. TO HELP HIM STRETCH!
THE IDIOT SPEAKS:
Our loveable idiots, Millar and Johnny Jesus, may be long gone, but
Our loveable idiots, Millar and Johnny Jesus, may be long gone, but
Keith "Fries With That 85 mph Fastball" Foulke is still saying dumb things.
Foulkey Talks To CHB And The Rest Of The Boston Media Vampires
Foulkey Talks To CHB And The Rest Of The Boston Media Vampires
"''I'll never be channeled toward baseball,' he said. ''That's just not going to happen. I'm not a baseball fan. I actually find baseball kind of boring. It's not my life. Pitching is something I enjoy doing. I'm probably going to get a lot of people that are a little chapped at me for saying that, but just don't take it the wrong way. I can't sit around and watch nine innings of a baseball game. The reason why I play this game is that I love the camaraderie with my teammates and I love to pitch. All the downtime of baseball is what I don't like."
And Here Comes The Modesty:
Oh, and one more thing. What about the final out of the '04 World Series? What about the infamous baseball Doug Mientkiewicz put into the vault? Does Foulke ever wish he'd taken that Edgar Renteria comebacker and run it over to first base himself?
''Yeah," he said. ''I'm not gonna brag, but I think I did a pretty good job in that Series and I'll be selfish. Yeah, I think I do deserve that ball. I know I did a good job. The team won. And all the other [stuff] -- [who was] MVP and the bloody sock -- you guys can have that. I made myself happy and I'm the toughest guy to please."
Hey Keith, we didn't particularly enjoy your BP fastball in 2005 either. Do yourself a favor: Stay out of the media, out of the bars(Want to see the photos?),off the radio, and on the mound, and you will get through your salary drive 2006 season.
-Foulkey Fries With That BP Fastball Hub
