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Wednesday, May 11, 2005

 

THE PISS MAN COMETH

ESPN.com - NFL - Vikings' RB Smith had drug test avoidance kit: "A search of a bag Smith was carrying April 21 turned up several vials of dried urine and a device called 'The Original Whizzinator,' which includes a fake penis, bladder and athletic supporter. An NFL spokesman said using the device during a drug test would be a violation of league drug policies, but it wasn't clear whether there were penalties for possessing one outside of a testing situation.
Airport police took an interest in Smith's possessions because the urine powder looked like cocaine, according to a police report of the April 21 incident, first reported in Wednesday's Star Tribune. Smith told police the dried urine was for his cousin. Smith was briefly questioned and then released."

The Ty Law excuse not withstanding, there is obviously a huge problem in professional sports that simply won't be caught by drug testing. Guys are now going to have to be searched for fake appendages, or the latest "Whizzenator." Urine powder that looks like cocaine? You kiddin' me? I wonder how many of these guys have mistaken their "pee baggies" for their blow during a 4am bender? This could get ugly.

"The good news Mr. Bonds is that you tested negative for banned substances. The bad news is that your urine test shows that you are going through menopause." -NF
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